LAUGHTER THE BEST MEDICINE: New Definitions in Alphabetical Order
Budget: A news bulletin in which you come to know that the prices of polyester lungis, printer cartridges, transistor radios, and high-end cars above 30 lakhs, all used on a daily basis, are going down whereas prices of rarely used items like petrol, vegetables, and food items shoot up like a rocket.
Bollywood Thriller: A 3-hour MTV style music video in which you see tight close-ups of the lean mean hero with skillfully manicured beard and skimpily clad women who must have wandered into frames which the director forgot to edit.
Cricket: That momentary long-range shot of grass and the stadia you get between ZooZoos and a visibly shaken SRK entertaining a grandma on a skateboard.
DVD: That storage device which gave many a film makers in India a great career.
Fabric: Cloth used by a spokesperson, articulate or otherwise, to condemn an act. E.g., “This attack is aimed at tearing down the very fabric of our society!”
Hollywood Thriller: A 116-minute conversation between a guy, who is eating something in almost all the scenes and another guy who is looking for his ex-wife, who is now the girlfriend of yet another guy.
Twitter: A little birdie which proved to be the doing and undoing of a high profile person.
Xerox Machine: A portable machine used by Indian music directors to convert inspiration into Bollywood Music.